Higher Gas Prices

This morning I was listening to the radio, as I am wont to do while eating breakfast. They were having listeners call in with explanations for our higher gas prices. And this one guy calls in...

Gas is headed toward $3.00 a gallon, this fellow explained, "because they went around years back buying up all the carburetors." Yes, "they." "They" knew that with carburetors, our cars could "get 30 or 40 miles a gallon." Therefore "they" decided to head this off at the pass by "buying up all the carburetors" to drive down our gas mileage, and "that is why higher gas prices now."

The host said, "So you're saying it's a conspiracy?"

This caller insisted that damn right it's a conspiracy. We have higher gas prices now because cars don't have carburetors any more. Because "they" plotted to go around and buy up all the carburetors.

Well, makes sense to me. Now excuse me while I go hunt up my tinfoil hat around here...

Oh, and coming next: why your gasoline is secretly fluoridated. ;-)